The Death Star Human Resources Department Newsletter: June 29, 2025
Hitchhiking along the Rimma Trade Route
Hello there
Good morning and welcome back to a brand new Death Star Human Resources Department Newsletter. It’s just a quick one this week. Trying to get back on a schedule. Last week wasn’t great. Next week, or I guess this week, isn’t looking much better. But, like the Rebellion we solider on. This week we’ve got Temuera Morrison trying to put on the Mandalorian armor for one more round, and we’ve got what might be the most detailed Star Wars map ever created.
This Is Where The Fun Begins
There are the rare occasions Star Wars gets a little, ahem, adult. Like like one of the New Jedi Order books with references to Luke and Mara having alone adult time, or the scene in The Acolyte, that was as friend of Death Star HR
put it, “the sexy Sith water scene.” Usually when one of these scenes happen, I say something like “it’s the horniest Star Wars scene since that one Clone Wars cartoon where Jar Jar had a girlfriend.”
Honestly, it’s a little terrifying how this episode basically lives rent free in my head. It’s nice to know there are other Sickos out there who think about it as well.
This Is Where The Fun Begins, Pt 2
Screenwriter and fellow Detroit Tigers fan Cole Haddon posed a question a couple days ago. If you were a Rebel pilot, what would your get pumped up music be for starting a Death Star trench run?
I thought about this for a few minutes. There are some obvious songs that are too obvious. “Danger Zone” or “Highway to Hell.” Maybe “Welcome to the Jungle.” All good songs but too obvious bordering on cliche. And then I realized the only real answer. “Bulls on Parade” by Rage Against The Machine.
Seriously, is there any better song for taking on the (evil) Empire? Cue that up and then 4 minutes later you’ll be saying to yourself "Right now I feel like I could take on the whole Empire myself."
This Is Where The Fun Begins, Pt 3
OK this is getting a little excessive here. Part 3 isn’t really Star Wars related but I’m going to make it work. I’m a huge fan of both Jack White and John C. Reilly. Who combined forces to make a video for Jack’s latest single, “Archbishop Harold Holmes.”
So what does this have to do with Star Wars? Absolutely nothing other than at a few points John is clearly channelling his inner Emperor Palpatine with the Force lightning.
Just watch the video. Both it and the song are fantastic.
Temuera Morrison Is Stuck in the Sarlacc Pit
There’s a part of me that wants to say Temuera Morrison is being greedy. He was Jango Fett in Attack of the Clones. Yes, he didn’t get to come back as Jango in Revenge of the Sith. I would say that a character losing a head usually means he’s dead. But Darth Maul has proven that being bisected with a lightsaber and falling down a bottomless shaft isn’t actually fatal. But even then, he did get to play Commander Cody and assorted Clone Troopers in ROTS. Fast forward almost 20 years, he got another leading role as the title character in Book of Boba Fett and got to do a pop ins Boba Fett in The Mandalorian, as Captain Rex in Ahsoka, and a veteran Clone Trooper in Obi-Wan Kenobi. In the mean time he kept busy doing voice work in various Star Wars video games.
We haven’t seen Boba Fett since the Book of Boba Fett ended. Much like Ewan McGregor has been campaigning for a second season of Obi-Wan, Morrison has been out there campaigning for Disney to give Book of Boba Fett a second season. In an interview with Collider, Morrison expressed that he really wanted to see Boba return.
"I'm sad too. Where The Book of Boba Fett Season 2? Where the hell is Season 2? I know they're doing Ahsoka Season 2. I'm going, 'Ah, where's my Season 2?'"
Temura, buddy, I hate to tell you but your season 2 is in the same spot that season 2 of Obi-Wan, The Acolyte, and Skeleton Crew are. It’s either officially cancelled or unofficially cancelled.
It seems to be Disney’s both official and unofficial policy that Star Wars is heading back to the big screen. Yes, there’s season 2 of Ahsoka. But that’s it. Everything else is now a movie. Somewhat ironic, in the rain on your wedding day type of way, since I’m positive Book of Boba Fett was supposed to be a Star Wars Story movie like Solo, and when Disney made their pivot to streaming, the orders were turn the Boba Fett movie into a streaming series. Same thing with Obi-Wan. Trying to get season 2 seems like something that isn’t going to happen any time soon.
Also, comparing yourself a peach is just a little…interesting.
"So it made me feel like, did you go to grandma's house? And she had that preservative jar of peaches up on the shelf. That's what I think. I'm one of those peaches, and I've been put up on the shelf. I've been preserved for a later date, and I'm going to be tastier. So yeah. So anyway, that's all that's happening. That's all I've heard. I know they're doing Ahsoka 2. Geez, I needed it to be in that Andor. What a show, Andor."
I can’t blame Morrison though. If I had a taste of being in the Star Wars galaxy, I’d be calling up Kathy and Dave and Jon to get them to put my character in everything. So I’m not saying stop, I’m saying read the tea leaves. The big screen is where it’s at. Try to get the Boba Fett movie instead.
Space Dads Don’t Need This Map
You know Wim’s dad didn’t need a map. He knew where he was going, dammit! I almost just linked this, but it’s so cool it needed a separate entry. I’ve mentioned this before but the fun thing about the Star Wars galaxy is that it’s as big or as small as needed. Kind of like lightsabers. They’re only as deadly as the story calls for. Sometimes you can get halfway across the galaxy in a matter of minutes. Other times it’s a matter of days. As fans we’ve been inundated with the names of planets and Star Wars. Some of the books occasionally have a map, and you often know generally where a planet it. We all know Coruscant is a Core World while Tatooine is in the Outer Rim. But we don’t always know how to get from A (Aldhani) to Z (Zeltros). At least until now, now we’ve got the Star Wars Galaxy Map.
One thing I thought was interesting is, that unless I just complete missed it (entirely possible) I didn’t see a label for Wild Space. There are planets on the 60 page PDF index that are labeled as Wild Space, but I don’t see it on the map.
The only thing that would make this better is if you could map out routes. Say you wanted to go from Moraband (what we KOTOR fans call Korriban) to At Attin, it would be fun if you could put in the two planets and it would show you the hyperspace route you’d have to take. Maybe even give you the option if you were going through the Core to avoid Coruscant at rush hour.
Also, it looks like Substacker Jason Fry was one of the writers for the map. Very cool.
This Day in Star Wars History
Two births and a book on June 29th in the galaxy far, far away.
Actor Michael Carter was born in 1947. Carter played Jabba the Hutt’s majordomo Bib Fortuna in Return of the Jedi. He was offered the chance to reprise the role for The Phantom Menace but turned it down due to how long it took to up on the makeup.
The O.H.G. (original Hutt gangster) Declan Mulholland passed away on this day in 1999. Mulholland played the human version of Jabba in the original cut of Star Wars, only to be left on the cutting room floor. The scene was re-worked for the 1997 Special Edition with a CGI Jabba, along with adding Boba Fett for good measure.
Legends novel MedStar I: Battle Surgeons was published in 2004. Part of the MedStar duology, I’m pretty sure these were the only books where Barriss Offee had a staring role. I have them somewhere in my bookcase, I wonder if the pitch was “M.A.S.H. but during the Clone Wars.”
From the Depths of Wookieepedia
If I told you that Livien Mangus was a character in the Star Wars universe, you’d have no reason not to believe me. Just going off the name, you’d be sure that Livien Mangus is some big, tough alien. Probably Wookiee-sized. Maybe not smart enough to be the crime boss, but for sure he works as an enforcer. Probably gets his kicks throwing people off of a building into some bottomless pit.
Turns out that Livien Mangus is a city. Bet you didn’t see that one coming.
Livien Magnus was the capital city of the planet Ord Radama. During the Great Galactic War, the Sith Empire attacked Ord Radama and besieged Livien Magnus, which was held by the forces of the Galactic Republic.
Just goes to show you can’t judge a city by its name. Even if Livien Mangus is a waaaaaay better name for a character.
News From the HoloNet
Star Wars fans not impressed at price for a Mark Hamill autograph
I’m pretty sure Hamill charges that much because A) people will still pay it and B) it keeps away “fans” who just want to yell at him about The Last Jedi
This Star Wars-Themed Desert Outpost in Utah Is As Strange As It Sounds
Once again, I am going to suggest the hosts offer an “Anakin Skywalker Experience” as an option. For an extra $250.00 you get a plastic lightsaber and you get to chase round people dressed up as Sand People.
He doesn’t say what he does think the best (best being subjective) movie is. Now I want to know.
Coca-Cola Returns to the Star Wars Universe to Celebrate Togetherness
I mean, they’re not Episode I Pepsi cans. But they do look pretty cool. And I’ll be honest, the commercial is more fun than it has any business being.
That’s it for this week. If you like what I’m doing, please subscribe. I’ll catch you next week, and may the Force be with you.
So Death Star run music is kind of like walk-up music... but I don't think Clarence's solo in "Land of Hope and Dreams" would work in this situation for me. I'll go with the opening of "You Could Be Mine."
Also that map is wild!
Bulls on Parade is a great choice. Sabotage would also be good.