The Death Star Human Resources Department Newsletter: May 30, 2025

Ignoring The Force Awakens' birthday before it happens

Hello there

Welcome back once again to the latest Death Star Human Resources Department Newsletter. This week is all about looking backwards and then forwards, but not staying in the present. Ten years ago to when The Force Awakens hit theaters, will there be a party in December? 20 years ago to the Revenge of the Sith video game dropped with a fun alternate ending. And 22 years ago the last New Jedi Order book was published. I finally finished and of course am looking ahead to the next book.

As always, thanks for subscribing. If you’re not a subscriber, now is the perfect time. Smash that subscribe button below. Alright, let’s get to it.

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This Is Where The Fun Begins

A while back, I pitched my top five ideas for new Star Wars shows. So far, the only response I’ve received from Lucasfilm is a restraining order. One of my ideas was a 1970’s style variety show, a la the Star Wars Holiday Special. I’m leaving that on the list, but adding a new requirement. It needs to be hosted by Denise Gough and Kyler Soller. With special guest appearances by Ben Mendelsohn.

That is not a clickbait title. It really is the two of them bringing chaotic energy for 14 minutes and it’s fantastic.

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This Is Where The Fun Begins, Pt 2

So many good memes, not enough time.

Is there an AI filter where you can put in Palpatine’s lines from the movie and it spits them back in Trump’s voice? That would fun.

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The Force Awakens is Turning 10. Will There be a Party?

Following up last week and all the talk around Andor and next year is the 10th anniversary of Rogue One and maybe we could get to watch Andor on the big screen, it seems like it’s been lost that this year is the 10th anniversary of The Force Awakens. I don’t really dabble in Star Wars internet other than to look for memes I can use so maybe there’s a push to get The Force Awakens back in the theaters, but it doesn’t seem like that many people care. If it was going to happen, it seems like the type of thing that would have been announced at Celebration last month.

Just as a side note, there were 10 years in between Revenge of the Sith and The Force Awakens, and The Force Awakens until now. Between ROTS and TFA, I graduated law school, moved to Texas, got a job, got married, bought and sold a house during the 2008 financial meltdown, moved to Dallas, changed jobs a few more times, made and lost new friends, and bought another house. If not for changing jobs a month ago, my life now would be the same as it was when The Force Awakens hit the theaters. Time and adulting are funny things.

I suppose that Disney could drop The Force Awakens in theaters as a December surprise, to coincide with when it was released 10 years ago. I’m not sure how scheduling with movie theaters works. Back in 2015, I saw it on a Friday matinee at the Alamo Drafthouse in Richardson, the only Alamo in DFW at the time. It was myself and a bunch of other people who were probably skipping work. I said this somewhat recently here on Death Star HR that The Force Awakens isn’t the best or my favorite Star Wars movie, but it has some fun moments and honestly the part where Han says “Chewie, we’re home” on the Falcon gives you a bit of chills.

Do people still want to see The Force Awakens in theaters? They did when it was released. It was the first movie since Disney bought Star Wars. It was a new Star Wars movie period! I think a lot of people had figured once Revenge of the Sith was released, that was it. Movies were over. We’d still get the books and comics and toys because the merchandising never stops.

The hype for this movie was huge. TFA set the record for most ticket presales and I believe it held the record for years until an unknown artist named Taylor Swift released a concert movie and a lot of people went to see it. I don’t remember the marketing push being to the level that The Phantom Menace was, but I could be wrong. If anyone knows of a BB-8 Pepsi machine, let me know. The Force Awakens also has the best combined Rotten Tomatoes score out of any of the Disney movies.

I was honestly a little surprised by this. The Last Jedi did well with on the Tomatometer but not the Popcornmetter and The Rise of Skywalker did the opposite. Solo’s scores for both are consistently low in the 60% range while Rogue One has both scores in the mid 80%. I walked out of the theater on a Friday afternoon having enjoyed myself but thinking “They just remade A New Hope but BIGGER.”

Given the divisive nature of the Sequel Trilogy and that Star Wars has, like seemingly everything else, been sucked into the all consuming culture war, it seems pretty likely Disney is going to do a low key 10th anniversary. Maybe the week of December 18th, the movie will be on the main page for Disney+ or something like that. All I’ve been able to find is special edition of Star Wars Insider that’s up for pre-order right now. And Disney did have a special logo for the TFA 10th anniversary they showed at Celebration.

kylo_ren_tfa_2024

A post shared by @kylo_ren_tfa_2024

Time heals all wounds. There wasn’t a 10th anniversary release for any of the Prequels either. I don’t think there would have been an appetite in 2009 for the fans to year Jake Lloyd proclaiming something was “wizard!” I would have gone to see it, but I’m also the type of person who buys a box of Wheat Thins because it has Darth Vader on it so I’m not exactly an unbiased observer here. More of an easy mark. The Prequel Kiddies were able to meme the Prequels back to respectability. Time will tell if the Sequel Kiddies will be able to do the same thing, but I do know that when the 20th anniversary of The Force Awakens rolls around in 2035, I’ll there at the theater to see it.

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When Emo Kids Rule the Galaxy

No, this isn’t about Kylo Ren being the Supreme Leader of the First Order, something that would have made a lot more sense. With all the 20th anniversary talk about Revenge of the Sith, it looks like the ROTS video game has popped up again. I don’t think I ever played it, but it did have a pretty fun alternate ending.

That’s the fun thing about Star Wars video games, you could get weird with it. Of course in the movie you couldn’t have Anakin defeat Obi-Wan and then kill Palpatine. But anything’s possible in a video game. As long as you program it I guess.

My favorite part of the video is when Anakin gives Obi-Wan a little nudge with his foot to send him tumbling down the hill. So much for having the high ground.

Per the interview with Revenge of the Sith video game writer Jeremy Barlow, the production for Revenge of the Sith sounds like Knights of the Old Republic II, things were always changing and they were trying to do it quickly.

Barlow said The Collective was constantly creating and tweaking character models, mechanics, and levels based on a film still in production. With the game dependent on what was in the final film, it was common for developers to build an entire level based on scenes they’d been shown, only to get word that the sequence had been cut from the movie.

That had to be an incredibly frustrating experience. But, it did lead to the Dark Side ending.

Those splashes of creativity paled in comparison to the game’s legendary alternate ending. Barlow said the idea for the ending actually came from the game’s publisher, LucasArts. During development, The Collective had briefly considered including two campaigns, one starring Obi-Wan and one starring Anakin. With such limited time and resources, the team ultimately decided on a single campaign with alternating protagonists, but that didn’t mean having to scrap what would’ve been the ending of Anakin’s campaign.

So Barlow pitched the specifics. Coming up with what happens if Anakin won his duel against Obi-Wan, he explained, was a matter of connecting the dots. Eliminating Obi-Wan would affirm his status as the most powerful force user in the galaxy. It would also let him process Obi-Wan’s words about Palpatine playing him like a fiddle.

“It just made sense to me,” Barlow said. “Let's have him just go back and kill Darth Sidious and say, ‘Now I'm going to take over the galaxy.’ It totally fit in with the whole Sith ideal of the apprentice growing and killing the master. It just seemed like a no-brainer, and we all went nuts for it.”

That’s making Banta Poodoo into Interstellar Garden Salad. Not sure if that’s how the phrase actually goes.

And just in case you want to want to watch a walk through of the entire game (something I did):

I’ve mentioned before one of my favorite things about Star Wars is that lightsabers are as deadly or as ineffective as the story needs them to be. Sometimes, like in The Phantom Menace, you can melt through blast doors. Other times such as in Ahsoka, getting hit with a lightsaber is like catching a bad cold.

“It’s just a flesh wound.”

Here in the Revenge of the Sith video game, you can take a lot of hits from a lightsaber and still survive.

I don’t want to sound like an old man yelling at a cloud, but back in my day of Super Mario Brothers or Contra, you were dead after one hit. Now, if you’ll excuse me, there are some youths out on the lawn that I need to go yell at.

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The Death Star Human Resources Department Book Club: New Jedi Order #19

The New Jedi Order series is done. 19 books later, the Yuuzhan Vong have been defeated. I guess maybe I should have spoiler alerted that but considering the series ended 22 years ago, I think I can get away without a warning. Besides, it’s not like the Yuuzhan Vong were ever going to actually win.

• Title: The Unifying Force

• Series: New Jedi Order. Book #19

• Author: James Luceno

• Date published: November 4, 2003

• Pages: 527

• Status: Legends

• Summary in less than 20 words: Much like the Yuuzhan Vong’s chances of taking over the galaxy, it’s finished!

Don’t worry, we’re going to talk about the cover illustration.

It took a lot longer than I thought. My first NHO Death Star HR Book Club entry was February 2nd, 2024. Which is a pretty fun Death Star HR anyway. If you’re new, go check that one out. I used to read a lot more, I would generally finish 50 books a year. Now it’s a lot less. Time that I used to spend reading is now time I’m working on Death Star HR. It’s not a complaint, writing Death Star HR every week has been a lot of fun. I’m hoping since Star Wars news is probably going to slow down for a bit, I’ll get the chance to catch up on my reading.

The book kicks off with a prison break as the Galactic Alliance is trying to rescue prisoners held by the Yuuzhan Vong with important information. The scene goes on for a while, but I will give James Luceno this. He really started the book off with a bang. One of the escapees manages to get out and is rescued by Han and Leia on the Falcon. This being the Star Wars universe, nothing ever goes as planned. The Falcon gets damaged and makes a random hyperspace jump to Caluula, an out of the way planet that had been holding their own against the Yuuzhan Vong. In the moves and countermoves each side is using against each other, Caluula was a trap. The some of the Galactic Alliance wants to use Alpha Red against the Vong. Alpha Red was a bio-weapon developed by the Chiss that supposedly would only target Yuuzhan Vong biology and allow the Galactic Alliance to do just a wee bit of genocide by wiping them all out.

Turns out, Alpha Red is a little too effective. It’s like if you spray weed killer and instead of just killing the weeds, it kills your lawn. Alpha Red kills just about everything. An infected Vong ship managed to escape. That’s probably bad. Wonder if it will come up later?

Meanwhile Luke and company are still on Zonama Sekot as the living planet makes its way through hyperspace heading back to Coruscant. Turns out that Harrar survived Nom Anor trying to kill him. A Star Wars tradition of dead characters not being dead. As they are in hyperspace with nothing to do, Sekot (again remember this is a living planet) chats with everyone. We finally get confirmation of what the series has been hinting at for several books now. Zonama Sekot is more or less a Yuuzhan Vong planet. The OG Vong planet, Yuuzhan'tar was destroyed but Zonama Sekot is the off-spring of Yuuzhan'tar. I know it’s a little out there even for Star Wars but just go with it. Also, as punishment for being extra-galactic jerks, Yuuzhan'tar stripped the Yuuzhan Vong from the Force. Similar to what happened with The Exile in Knights of the Old Republic II, I suppose.

Back on Yuuzhan'tar 2, aka Coruscant, Nom Anor has finally gotten the promotion he dreamed of. Supreme Lord Shimrra has made him a Prefect. Which I guess is a good thing. Unfortunately for Nom, nobody likes him and his army of Shamed Ones are still out there waiting for the Jedi to lead them to freedom. When Zonama Sekot exits hyperspace and appears above Coruscant, Shimrra loses it. He goes from your typical power-hungry dictator to a batshit crazy power-hungry dictator. Shimrra orders any of his possible successors killed and tells the rest of the Yuuzhan Vong elite that he’s declaring war on all the Gods except for Yun-Harla, the Trickster. Even in his ranting though, Shimrra knows that Zonama Sekot is at least close enough to Yuuzhan'tar, that he can use the Vong ship infected with Alpha Red to kill the planet. Still following?

Luke, Jaina, and Jacen fight their way through to get to Shimrra, figuring if they can kill the Supreme Overlord, the Yuuzhan Vong will be lost without their leader. Luke decapitates Shimrra, using his lightsaber and Anakin’s. Unfortunately there’s a twist! Shimrra wasn’t the true Supreme Overlord. The real Supreme Overlord was Onimi. The court jester who everything just assumed was an annoying Shamed One. Turns out, Omini was a Vong Shaper who grafted part of a yammosk to his brain and managed to reactivate his Force powers. Since he was a Shamed One he could never have a place among the Yuuzhan Vong elite, but no reason he couldn’t just control Shimrra with his mind.

Interesting part here. Because the whole “the Yuuzhan Vong exist outside the Force” was used in the book to explain why the Jedi couldn’t easily defeat the Vong. A Jedi could use a Force against a Yuuzhan Vong to say Force push them away. But a Jedi couldn’t use a Jedi Mind Trick on them. So I’m not sure how Omini was able to use the Force to control Shimrra.

Anyway, Omini is convinced that the Jedi are avatars of the Yuuzhan Vong Gods. Because if you have no idea about the Force and you see people who can move stuff with their mind, assuming they are gods is actually a pretty logical conclusion. Jacen battles Omini and is able to become one with the Force. Not in the becoming one with the Force when you die, but becoming pure Force energy. Think Neo at the end of The Matrix.

In the end, everyone decides to get along. Despite committing war crimes that would make Chopper proud, what remains of the Yuuzhan Vong get to go back to Zonama Sekot as long as they pinky swear not to try to take over the galaxy again. One thing that always was stuck in the back of my mind was “why were these books called New Jedi Order? Instead of Star Wars: Now With More War.” We finally get our answer. Luke tells everyone there’s going to be a new Jedi order that focuses on the unifying Force. It’s all spelled out in the title of the book here. The unifying Force doesn’t get hung up on Light Sides and Dark Sides and galactic governments. Instead it’s an idea that the best way for a Jedi to serve the Force is to follow their conscious. If that doesn’t sound like some “George Lucas Child of the 60’s” nonsense, I don’t know what does.

The book ends with a surprisingly touching scene where everyone gathers on Kashyyyk, the Wookiee homeworld to honor Chewbacca and Anakin. Everyone wraps up with a feast, thankful that the galaxy is at peace. At least until the next book series.

The Good:

• It’s over! Nineteen books is a pretty big task.

• James Luceno stuck the landing. I was a little worried going into the book about how it would end. Obviously the Vong weren’t going to win. I knew this, if for no other reason than there are books that take place after the NJO series sitting on my book shelf. But the last 30 or so pages were just great, especially the very end where all our heroes got finally pay tribute to the fallen. I honestly was a little moved, not something that really tends to happen in Star Wars books.

The Bad:

• It’s over.

• No real complaints about this book. I guess if we’re talking about the New Jedi Order series as a whole, there were times it felt like it was getting padded. Like some things could have been cut down and have the series be, say sixteen books.

Wildcards:

• OK I have to talk about the cover art again. Who are the two guys supposed to be? The Yuuzhan Vong there is Shimrra, the Supreme Overlord and a major character in the book so it makes sense. But the guys? It’s clearly not Luke or Han. Could it be Jacen Solo and Jagged Fel? Maybe. And it a lot of ways the NJO is really Jacen’s story. But it doesn’t really match the description of Jacen in the books, and Jagged Fel is a fine character but he’s not a “get the cover of the last book in a huge series” type of character.

• If you remember way back to the first book, Vector Prime, it opened with a bang when the Yuuhzan Vong dropped a moon on Chewbacca. Some people did not take it well.

  

  Guys (because I’m sure it was almost entirely guys, we’ve been over this before. Stop it! I get that Star Wars fans mistaking a movie or book for reality is a long tradition. Billy Dee Williams has talked about fans harassing him for Lando betraying Han. But really, there’s no excuse. Chewbacca is not real. He exists on screen or on paper.

  

So what does the future hold for the Death Star Human Resources Book Club? I have four more Star Wars books I am going to read this year. Next up is Legends novel Rogue Planet by Greg Bear since it features Zonama Sekot. Then there are three canon books on my shelf that I really have been wanting to get do. Rise of the Red Blade by Delilah Dawson, The Rise and Fall of the Galactic Empire by Dr. Chris Kempshall, and The Mask of Fear by Alexander Freed. After that I think I’m going to get caught up on the non-space wizard books that are sitting on my shelf. So long, Yuuhzan Vong. It’s been a ride.

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This Day in Star Wars History

May 30th was a bit of a slow day in the Star Wars universe. Although we have a video game entry here to save the day.

• Mike W. Barr was born in 1952. Barr is a comic book author who wrote several X-Wing related comics. He also wrote the short story “Death in the Catacombs” which A) sounds more like an Indiana Jones story and B) popped up when I was hitting the randomizer button for a From the Depths of Wookieepedia entry.

• Illustrator and product designer Chris Reiff was born in 1973. Reiff worked on some of the packing for Hasbro’s Black Series line of action figures which are pretty cool and I’d love to start collecting them but there’s just no room at Death Star HR HQ. He also worked on something called Star Wars Lightsaber Thumb Wrestling. Which is real.

• Expanded Universe Legends novel Legacy of the Force: Betrayal is published in 2006. Legacy of the Force was the first big series of books after New Jedi Order. Betrayal, by Aaron Allston was the first one. I don’t know a lot about this series, I have it sitting on my shelf and am going to try to get to it soon.

• Awww yeah. Star Wars Knights of the Old Republic is released for iOS on this date. My love of KOTOR is pretty well known here, but I will admit I’ve never tried this version. I just have a tough time believing it would play well on my phone.

• Actor John Beasley passed away in 2023. Beasley had a long career as a character actor with a couple long term TV shows. In the galaxy far, far away he played the bartender from the cold open of The Mandalorian.

  

  And it really was a cold open. It was on an ice planet!

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From the Depths of Wookieepedia

I read this one really quickly and thought it said “Mandarin oranges.” Obviously that was the inspiration for Mandalorian oranges. Said oranges were best known as part of the Interstellar Garden Salad at Dex’s Diner.

"Our most popular salad, featuring crisp Revwien lettuce garnished with topatoes, space-carrots, Qiraadishes, Mandalorian oranges, Sriluurian raisins and Wol Cabasshews. Served with Luptoomian dressing."

Dex’s Diner never seemed like a place you’d want to get a salad. Probably a good place to get whatever the Star Wars equivalent is of a coney dog, sure. But a salad? Hard pass.

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News From the HoloNet

‘Andor’ Season 2 Emmy Submissions Revealed in 23 Categories Including Directing, Writing and Four Guest Stars (EXCLUSIVE)

Just give Andor all the Awards. Best comedy? Andor. First Annual Montgomery Burns Award for Outstanding Achievement in The Field of Excellence? Andor.

The CIA Secretly Ran a Star Wars Fan Site

This is a real story and not from The Onion. A tip of the old Imperial ISB uniform cap to fellow Dallasite

Paul Riddell

, dean of admissions at the St. Remedius Medical College for alerting me to this.

Ryan Reynolds Wants Disney to “Gamble” on an R-Rated ‘Star Wars’ Project

Andor has shown there is room in the galaxy far, far away for a more adult story.

I Have Finally Figured Out Why Star Wars Fans Hate "Broom Boy" So Much

Up until today I wasn’t aware people hated Broom Boy. Pro tip. Don’t read the comments.

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That’s it for this week. If you like what I’m doing, please subscribe. I’ll catch you next week, and may the Force be with you.