The Death Star Human Resources Department Newsletter. March 1st, 2024
Escape Mount Tantiss. Go outside. Have a drink.
Hello there
Welcome to this week’s edition of the Death Star Human Resources Department Newsletter. We’ve got a fun one. The Bad Batch continues their adventures and I’m not entirely sure where they go from here. I, a terminally online person make a plea for us to just go outside. And while you’re outside, have a drink in a Star Wars glass and maybe think about architecture.
As always, if you’re enjoying Death Star HR, please tell a friend. It’s free. Now, let’s get to it.
This Is Where The Fun Begins
I’ve mentioned before my real job is being a law talkin’ dude. So this one speaks to me.
Sure, you’ve got the Syril Karn types who would want to investigate this. But Vader’s too high up in the Empire, and everybody knows that Palpatine has the judges in his pocket. That investigation is dead before it even starts. Forget it, Jake. It’s Coruscant.
Getting the Bad Batch Band Back Together
The moment we’ve been waiting for since last year finally arrived. Omega was reunited with Hunter and Wrecker, just call them the Bad Batch Remnant. Obviously this was going to happen, the only question was when exactly it would happen. We got our answer. Episode 4. But before we get our reunion, we had to get through what was a standard Star Wars cartoon episode.
Omega and Crosshair have escaped Mount Tantiss in a barely functioning ship and they crash land on the planet Lau. Lau is like most other planets you meet for the first time in Star Wars, it has one defining characteristic. It’s either all desert, or jungle, or windy, or whatever. Lau is cold. We know this because we see Omega and Crosshair’s (can we call them Cromega to save time? I think so) breath and even the Stormtroopers are wearing overcoats. It’s not quite Hoth, but it’s still chilly.
Needing to get off the planet, they head to the spaceport. If you’ve seen one spaceport in Star Wars, you’ve seen them all. If you’re a Sicko, I bet I could tell you to describe the Lau spaceport and you could do it without having seen the episode. A bunch of one or two story buildings that look run down. The Stormtroopers on patrol. The cantina where you can go to get a drink and find some shady dealings. The locals looking to shake you down. The corrupt Imperials looking to shake you down. It’s not necessarily a bad thing all the spaceports across the galaxy are the same, it makes for moving the story along. How much adventure can you really have if you’re stuck in the suburbs of Coruscant?
Needing money to bribe their way on a ship, Cromega head to the cantina where Omega hustles a patron at a game of Balaans. To tell you what a Sicko I am, I could tell at once they weren’t playing Sabaac. Anyway, Omega keeps winning, eventually beating the Imperial Officer who’s in the cantina to collect his bribe. He then demands a bribe from Omega for her gambling fine. The kid outside the cantina demands a bribe to tell Omega where the Imperials took Batcher. For such a backwater planet, Lau seems to be pretty expensive. Your bribe budget is going to be higher than your housing budget. The rescue attempt of Batcher goes sideways when the Imperials spring a trap and Cromega shoot their way out, steal a ship, and get the hell off of Lau.
Then we get the moment we’ve been waiting for. Crosshair tells Omega they need to ditch the ship, but she’s sent a signal to Hunter and Wrecker to meet her on one of the moons of Ryloth. The Marauder is already there waiting. It’s honestly a touching moment to see Omega and Wrecker back together. Even Dark and Broody Hunter hugs Omega and his happy to see her. But then, after Omega tells them she had help escaping, Crosshair walks down the shuttle ramp and there’s a vibe shift. The episode ends with the both sides starring at each other.
Random notes:
It has been shown over course of the show that Omega is basically unbeatable at games. That skill plus another mention of her blood having a high M-Count makes me think this is her Force skill. If the Bad Batch needs money, they should take her to Canto Bight and have her clean up at the tables.
Per Wookipedia, the name of the Imperial Officer in this episode was Captain Mann. Come on, you couldn’t have spent 10 more seconds on the name?
It took me a while to realize Omega named her pet lurca hound “Batcher.” Because of voice actor Michelle Ang’s accent, I thought “the hound,” as Crosshair lovingly calls it, was named “Betcha.”
Speaking of Crosshair, it sucks to be him right now. You turn your back on your bros to stick with the Empire. Only to have the Empire decide that Clones are the Microsoft Zune of soldiers, old tech that needs to be discarded. So your thanks for years of loyal service is being shipped off to Mount Tantiss to be used as Dr. Hemlock’s guinea pig. It’s worth remembering how matter how loyal you think you are, you’re just a cog in the machine.
I am curious where the season is going to go from here. We have most of the band back together. Echo and Rex are still out there, we haven’t seen them yet this season. I am guessing the season ends with some kind of rescue mission to free the rest of the Clones stuck on Mount Tantiss, but I’m not quite sure how we get there.
Go Touch the Grassy Fields of Dantooine
I wanted to write about this last few weeks but just ran out of time. If you’re not Extremely Online, you may not have heard the phrase “touch grass” before. It basically means what you might think it does. Get off the internet. Go outside. Smell the fresh air. Feel the breeze on your skin. Maybe actually run your fingers across the grass. And mostly importantly, stop engaging in whatever online nonsense you were a part of. It’s probably advice all of could use, but it’s advice that a certain section of Star Wars fans definitely could use.
Daisy Ridley, best known as Rey Palpatine Skywalker and star of the Sequel Trilogy has been making the rounds lately promoting her latest movie, the indie film Sometimes I Think About Dying. I don’t know this for a fact, but I am pretty certain that if you were in a Star Wars movie, especially in a leading roll, there is a rule in Hollywood that says it doesn’t matter what you’re there to talk about, you’re going to get asked about Star Wars. When asked about the backlash to The Last Jedi from a certain section of the fanbase, and then backlash again to The Rise of Skwalker, Ridley said:
“It’s still upsetting,” Ridley said now when asked about the response. “You don’t want people to feel like you’ve not served the thing they’re a fan of. But [‘The Last Jedi’] was so divisive…it felt like the first one everyone was responsive in the same way. The second, super divisive. The last one, super divisive. It didn’t change how I felt about it.”
I am not here to re-litigate the Sequel Trilogy. It is what it is. Everyone has picked a side.
What I am going to suggest is we all need to chill out a little. When a Star Wars fansite runs an article entitled “Star Wars is not worth the health and well-being of human beings” maybe there’s a bit of a problem. Just since Disney took over Star Wars, Ridley, along with Kellie Marie Tran, John Boyega, and Moses Ingram have all suffered abuse from the “fans.” After the Prequels, Jake Lloyd retired from acting two years after The Phantom Menace due to the response he got. Ahmed Best contemplated suicide because of the backlash to Jar Jar Binks. Even Billy Dee Williams had people angry at him for Lando betraying Han.
I’m not sure there’s any way for an actor to truly understand what they’re getting into. When Ridley first was cast as Rey, she received some advice/a warning from JJ Abrams:
“Understand the scale,” he told her upon getting the part. “This is not a role in a movie. This is a religion for people. It changes things on a level that is inconceivable.
If that’s not a clear word of warning, I don’t know what is.
In the GQ interview, Ridley goes on to note that the movies took a toll on her health.
By the time The Last Jedi opened, the wear was showing on Ridley. “I saw a picture of me at the London premiere and I was so skinny and my skin was terrible.” Internally, things were worse: she had developed holes in her gut wall, the result of stress. Her self-diagnosis is blunt: “My body was just fucked up. I got tests done and it turned out my body was taking in no nutrients. I was just like a little skeleton and I was just so tired. I was becoming a ghost.”
I’m not a doctor, but I know that’s not good.
If the pressure from the fans and celebrity culture in general is so horrifying and toxic that your body starts shutting down, maybe we as fans ought to reconsider just how healthy our fandom is.
Great Moments in Star Wars Merchandising
February 22nd was National Margarita Day. Or as we say in Texas, it’s just another Thursday. To celebrate the day and to the early spring weather, I poured myself a marg and went to the front porch to finish up last week’s newsletter. It also was a good excuse to finally bust out these Star Wars cocktail glasses I got from Death Star HR readers and real life friends, my next door neighbors.
Pretty cool, eh. Drinks with Darth has a nice ring to it. It sounds like something the Death Star Human Resources Department would dream up as an employee appreciation but goes sideways when Vader Force chokes a janitor something like that. Anyway, the whole set of glasses is really nice. You’ve got Darth Vader, a Stormtrooper, R2-D2, and a TIE Fighter. But it’s conspicuous in who isn’t on the glass. C-3PO. Human/Cyborg relations. I’ll explain.
The glasses are from the Deco Collection. Art Deco is a style from the early part of last century. Most people associate it with architecture, but it really covers everything from jewelry to buildings1. The most famous example, at least in America, is probably the Empire State Building. Dallas has the largest collection of Art Deco buildings owned by one entity at Fair Park. I don’t know a lot about different styles of architecture, but Art Deco is usually one I can pick out. Now, you’re probably thinking this is an interesting little bit of knowledge, but what does it have to do with the galaxy far, far away and when are we going to get back to C-3PO? Fair question. I’m getting there.
Each of the characters, and one ship, on the glasses have a distinct style and inspiration. The look of Darth Vader was inspired by samurai armor. The stark black and white look of the Stormtroopers was to give them a look of living skeletons. Mobile trashcan R2-D2 was drawn from the movies The Hidden Fortress and Silent Running. And the TIE Fighter came from an idea to just make a spaceship that was as alien and villainous looking as possible. None of those are art deco inspired.
If C-3PO had a mother, it would be Maschinenmensch2 from the 1927 Metropolis. A movie I’ve never seen but is well known as having very strong art deco vibes. Just look at the movie poster.
This is the Maschinenmensch. Played by German actress Brigitte Helm. Notice any resemblance to our favorite translator droid?
And that’s C-3PO after he’s gone through some revisions. Golden Rod’s original design in the sketches from Ralph McQuarrie were…I’m not going to use the world ripoff, so let’s just say an homage to the Maschinenmensch.
All this to say a few things. 1: Art Deco is a cool style. 2: I’m amazed you can have Art Deco inspired glasses and somehow leave of C-3PO, the most Art Deco character in all of Star Wars. And 3: I could go for a margarita.
From the Depths of Wookieepedia
Whenever I need something weird for an entry, I go back to the comics. As I’ve said plenty of times, the comics are for the real Sickos. This is wear Lucas really like the writers go nuts, any idea that was too strange for a movie, or even a little too strange for a book can find a home in the comics. So this week we’ve got the Flying Bantha.
When I first saw the title, I figured it was maybe the name of a Grav-Ball team or some really weird Sith darkside creature. Nope. Just a ship that actually does look like a bantha.
News From the HoloNet
EA Cancels Respawn Star Wars Shooter Amid Mass Layoff
First KOTOR gets cancelled, now this.
Ahmed Best Reprising His Jar Jar Binks Role in New STAR WARS Video Game Project
Hoping for a Darth Jar Jar game.
Star Wars Fans Can Soon Bid on C-3PO’s Head
Got a spare 500K for 3PO’s noggin?
First of its kind 'Star Wars' movie slated to film entirely in California
Mandalor has been relocated to the Golden State.
Star Wars' Next Book Will Chronicle the Empire's Evil Lifetime
Evil, or misunderstood? OK, evil.
That’s it for this week. If you like what I’m doing, please subscribe. I’ll catch you next week, and may the Force be with you.
At least that’s what Wikipedia tells me.
German for “Machine-Human.”
Art Deco definitely my favorite, I think it stems from when i first saw The Rocketeer for the first time as a kid. The club and buildings were so cool, plus the Rocketeer outfit was awesome. I keep trying to get my wife on the Art Deco train but she is having none of it!